Little Green Lies

I’ve been having an intermittent problem with my MacBook Pro laptop. Intermittent is a very potent word here. defines Intermittent as:

  1. stopping or ceasing for a time; alternately ceasing and beginning again: an intermittent pain.
  2. alternately functioning and not functioning or alternately functioning properly and improperly.

Tech support personnel define Intermittent as:

  1. Yeah, right!
  2. Prove it; if you can.

On a Mac laptop the power adapter has a little light; a green light means the battery is fully charged (to Apple’s sad specifications) or an orange light means the battery is being charged. That’s it; the light should be green or orange. But the light on my adapter has been intermittently out.

Missy defines Intermittent as:

  1. Only working correctly sometimes, which means it is not working the way it should be.
  2. Going to be annoying to prove to tech support.

I once tape recorded the grinding noise that was intermittently bleating from a floppy drive. I called tech support and told the dude I had recorded the noise and he laughed at me. Then he heard the tape and instantly ordered a new drive for me. He said hearing the recording meant he didn’t have to walk me through tests or patches, because the sound clearly meant the drive was pounding on death’s toes.

This time when faced with “Intermittent” I again recorded, but this time sound wasn’t important–visual was the key. Below is the first video I recorded. It’s about 10-silent seconds, so give it a whirl.

I then took the power adapter, my laptop and my Canon SD 500 with the display on back to an Apple store. Apple likes to call their tech support people Geniuses. I like to call that Pompous. While he was fiddling with the laptop and the cord, I pulled out my trusty, but old Canon SD 500 and showed him the same clip you viewed above. He said:

“Wow. I’m really glad you showed me that. Now we know there REALLY is a problem.”

Gee, nice to be called a liar by a pompous genius. It wasn’t REALLY a problem until the video proved it. I’m sure that meant without the video they would have kept my computer in prison attached to a lie detector for days and days to prove I was making false claims. Is it considered torture to waterboard a computer? (And of all the things I could choose to lie about on my computer why would I choose this? Please!) Since the video proved I REALLY wasn’t lying, he gave me a new power adapter, but said to come back if the problem continued. (If he’d been more carefully with his wording, I wouldn’t blog about it.)

The problem continued the next night, so I recorded it again and went back to the Apple store the next morning. (Since it shows essentially the same thing, I won’t bother you with the second video.) This Apple tech dude watched the two videos and simply said they were going to have to re-place a board inside the computer. How nice. He didn’t call me a liar. This genius should give dialogue coaching to the first one. It was, he assured me, a quick fix…oh, except they didn’t have the part. The part would arrive Monday…oh, except Monday is a holiday, so the part won’t arrive till Tuesday…but, he promised again, it would be a quick fix and they would call me as soon as the part came in on Tuesday.

Late Wednesday afternoon, I called them. “Oh yes, the part is in, we just haven’t called you yet. And if you bring your computer in now, we can have it ready for you in a few days.” Uh? What happened to a “quick fix?” This third Apple pompous said he currently had about ten computers to work on so it would take a while to get to mine. However, if I brought it in around 8:30 Sunday or Monday morning he would work on it right away and have it done in a few hours.

What? Does that mean they only INTERMITTENTLY have several computers to repair? I’m thinking about asking for video proof of those other computers just so I REALLY know it’s a problem. And why tell me it’s a quick repair in the first place if my computer has to wait in line behind all those other computers? I wonder if their problems were intermittent too.

I know tomorrow is only Saturday, but I may take my computer in there in the morning to see if they’ll fix it right away. I’m REALLY INTERMITTENTLY confident they’ll say that’s a problem.

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